Sunday, December 30, 2012

Dear Me (5 years Ago)

Dear CAL,

Yes, you feel like your life is stuck in a limbo zone of not having a stable relationship and the world is passing you by and you are just standing still.  Friends have already gotten married, popped out a few kids, and you still just want to buy some new shoes.  Boys confuse and irritate you, but like a moth to a flame you keep going back and getting burned.  You don't need to obsess about why some guy stood you up on a date, or why when a guy says he completely gets you and are a fantastic woman he still doesn't want to commit to you, or how that guy that seems way perfect--is really way not perfect.  QUIT OBSESSING NOW CAL!  Put down your phone and quit checking for flirty text messages.  Pay attention to those that are actually around you.  Quit asking yourself (and anyone who will listen), but if only he would do this?  Quit trying to make the relationship work.  Quit obsessing.  Start enjoying being single--there is nothing like it!  The friendships you have in your single days will never happen again, so treasure them.  Enjoy doing only your laundry....and knowing why your laundry smells the way it does (once you get married that will change...boys stink!).  Enjoy not having to explain to another human being why you have to go on a wine trip with your girlfriends.  Most of all, be patient.  Why?  Because when the right man comes along, he will make you his, no questions asked.  He will make his presence known and want to take you home (literally and figuratively) and he wants you to meet his parents.  There will be questions...but not the "does he really like me?" question.  Because when a man sees something he wants forever, he doesn't sit on the sideline, he doesn't wait for you to make the move, he purchases.  Just like a Farmall Model A in pristine condition he's always dreamed of having, he will drive 3 hours with a trailer and load it up---he will do the same with you.  So enjoy this single time--its precious and will never occur again.  The season will change and married life will begin, but both are equally important in this crazy circle of life.

Luv ya!


  1. This is by far an amazing letter to yourself!

  2. This post reminds me of an email you sent several years ago. We tend to focus on the questions instead of looking at the answers present in the day-to-day moments. Also, looking back (like you did in this post) think of all that you learned about yourself, about life, your wants and desires, etc. If you had met J 15 years ago, you might not have been ready to appreciate him. Now you do! That's a good thing. What you lived through in the process was tough but maybe that toughness gives you extra umphh on the farm.