So people grieve very differently, its a personal thing to each person and no 2 people probably react in the same way. Well one way for me is the outpouring of written word...so here goes.
When I was in college and my Dad died, it was a very sudden thing. There wasn't a lot of tears, the band-aid was quick. Now over time, random things get to me. But they are generally private and only me, or my bro and sis get what I'm talking about. Yesterday, my Grandpa passed away, and it wasn't a quick thing, it was something that we knew was coming. As I waited with my Grandma and the rest of my family, I hugged my Grandma and heard her say "What am I going to do--he's part of me?" Now they had been married for 63 or so years, and dated before then. This is incomprehensible to my little mind, spending a lifetime with someone and having them not there one day. But this is what grieving is--a mirror of our own mortality.
When my Dad died, I grieved, but in a different way, and thought about it differently. With my Grandpa, I look at my own life and my new husband and realize how blessed am I to have such a wonderful man that God has paired me with. The thought of him not in my life makes me sad--and its not even a speck of sand in the hourglass compared to my grandparents. I look at the banquet of family that was there at the end and realize what a blessing my crazy, obnoxious, opinionated, family is. The mirror of what we have and what we had is spinning, the blessings shining through both sides. So what is grieving? Is it sorrow of what we had? Is it sorrow of what we missed? Or is it sorrow for what we haven't appreciated yet? Hmmm....I don't know, but the hubs gets an extra hug tonight--does yours?