Sunday, November 20, 2011

Free Range Beef (A Story)

So we really should start marketing our cattle as free range range chickens are all the rage...why can't beef be too?  LOL.  So as I was leaving for church today, a calf was standing in our yard.  I yelled and he waddled back in, here's how the story goes:

"Clarice, I say this wind is chilly."

"Oh Myrtle what we need is a new coat...say did you see crazy lady's new coat?"

"Clarice you spend way too much time looking over the fence, this here is some good Milo."

"I'm serious girls, she came out the other day in this vintage white fur coat...I about ran for high country thinkin I was seein snow."

"Hmph, high dollar fluezy, that girl is crazy."

"Louise don't be a stick in the mud, it was faux fur."

"I tell you what, DENNIS, come here boy."

"Yes Momma"

"Now I know you're fixing to hop through the fence, just wait until 8:00 right before the crazy lady leaves.  Then hop through the fence, and stand right in the yard, so she sees you.  Then, when she drives all crazy like over to you, the girls will get to see her coat."

"But Momma, this Milo is sooo goood."

"Boy, you hop over that fence at 8:00 or I will tan that black hide of yours."

"Yes Momma."

(30 minutes later)

"Well I guess I owe you a cube Clarice, that coat is fine, crazy lady be lookin good today."

"Told you so, I know my vintage goods."

1 comment: